Compassion.... Smashion

I experienced some very crappy things today that I will not get into, because thinking of it all drives me crazy. I am planning, or hoping that I will be receiving a dose of some slobbering inducing sleep tonight, it is much needed and wanted... 'cause anxiety is at an all time high and not letting up... with depression coiling it's way into the program! I try to do the best that I can, I work very damn hard at curbing my "episodes", I don't want to hurt anyone with my actions or words. Maybe I should concentrate a little less on how my issues effect those around me. Hell, they don't really take my feelings to heart... anyway!! Yes, I'm constantly hearing that there is so much compassion and love directed my way. Yet, there are people in my life... as I see them, trying their best to add to the madness. You have to wonder, at least I do, what the hell did I do to deserve these interlopers... human, mental disorders and the imaginary kind!!!