Hair-Ruse

Can not sleep... been thinking that tomorrow is the day that I shall cut off the remainder of what used to be a gorgeous head of hair. As I lost my way, my hair decided to do a runner!! In the past I would have been so uptight over this. So much so, that my stomach would be turned inside/out. Shit, I'd be ready to occupy a corner somewhere, all huddled up thinking it was the end of the world. Well, now I'm kinda indifferent to the procedure/outcome... I will try NOT to dwell on this! Maybe this is just a ruse... the bitch and her bastards are very conning...  they like to sit back and wait, till your guard is down. Then the next thing you know... your ass IS in a corner! We shall see!

Run Away.... Not!!

Another fight with a-tag-along! Although earlier, I thought that it would be a good-thing to remain ornery by denying this big ole piss-taker the glory/ fame it's forever seeking. However, in the midst of this somewhat "ground hog" day/night, I'm feeling extremely compelled to acknowledge it by name/tittle... Insomnia. I have no idea why I felt/feel commanded to do so, maybe just hoping that it would somehow change its mind and become a run-away. Yes run! Because I gave it some "respect"... wishful thinking on my part... that's for sure!

Just thinking of all the packing that I have to get done in 3 days. I received a headache while walking through the house, eyeing all the goods. I'm feeling overwhelmed and unsteady, and I fear an attack is trying to make itself known, not only to Me, but... to All that come into contact with Me! I believe that Bipolar is a bitch that's scorned, out for vengeance and willing to do any and every thing... to cause havoc and ruin. I hate her and her bastards!

The day has been slow and unproductive. I'm longing for the night to come, even if I'm not fortunate to produce a "well slept" corpse tomorrow morning. Yes... I know corpse is a morbid word to equate with your own living shell, but this is an example of what I meant in my disclaimer. I will be "honest" and will not "sugar-coat" what I have to say. I fully exercise my right to do so, without intentionally offending others.  By the way, I found out from Jan Brady (my middle sister) that mother IS using the "Holy Royal Oil" to anoint her OWN forehead. JB reported that she walked in the room and saw the mark of the cross glistening on mother. Now I am left wondering who gave her the authority to perform such sacred acts? Just joking about the last sentence!
Heee Heee ;-D

5:22 AM

I am freaking out right now...

One of my cats has developed some crazy skin disease and it's gotten worse. It looks like her entire throat is being consumed. I am praying and hoping that it's not Necrotizing Fascitiis (if it is/was, she'd be dead by now). I put her in the main bathroom and she's crying her heart out. My anxiety is so out of control, I have not taken my medication for fear that I may swallow what ever she's got. I keep washing my hands/ feet, and spraying them with this stuff that medical facilities use to disinfect surfaces. I've even sprayed my bed, but it's not helping to calm the evil beast. It's 5:22 AM, I don't know if I'll be able to make it until the Vet opens the door... I am unable to think of anything else, every itch, tingle of my skin is conspiring to keep me locked in an abyss.

Okay

Although I slept well, with help from Ambien, I awoke feeling the Anxiety tip-toeing in. So, we'll have to see what the rest of the day brings, there isn't much that I HAVE to do, but... there's plenty of SHOULD/NEED stuff. Yesterday, was actually such a lovely day. I worked for my sister, and spent some time with my son Dee, just hanging out. I was able to ignore the sizzling of his crackling voice... "puberty's punishment"!
Even Mother, the caretaker of the sacred "Holy Oil" didn't get a rise out of me. I was so pleased that I was able to fend off all nuisances, I felt in control. Once I made it home, I noticed that my water hose was missing. I think it's the mortgage company that I'm fighting with. I think it's harassment. I could be... wrong!!